Sunday, April 5, 2009

AWARDS and Friendships

This week’s blog starts off with a Thank You to
Dottie She has honored me with The Proximidade Award. This wonderful award is given for friendship cyber or otherwise. As Dottie said, This blog invests and believes in the Proximity - nearness in space, time and relationships. These blogs are exceedingly charming. These kind bloggers aim to find and be friends. They are not interested in prizes or self-aggrandizement! Our hope is that when the ribbons of these prizes are cut, even more friendships are propagated. Please give more attention to these writers!

Deliver this award to eight bloggers who must choose eight more and include this clever-written text into the body of their award."

Oh my gosh, there are so many I want to give this award too, but I can only give this to eight?
I offer this award to:
Lea From day one we connected as friends and I don’t care that you live so far away. I adore you with all my heart!
Judi Fennell Sometimes the Gods just put people in our path and that’s how I found you. Judi is the sweetest woman and I call her a dear friend.
C.L. Wilson Cheryl, you’re a young woman but an old friend. I don’t get to spend as much time with you as I’d like but you know where my heart is, darlin’.
KimberlyLlewellyn Sweetie, you’re a new friend but I feel as if I’ve known you forever!
Liza You’re a sweetheart!
Romance Bandits Yap, I adore each and every one of you girls! It’s a special cyber friendship I cherish.
Sia McKye Again, a cyber friendship that has become so dear to my heart. Sia, you’re such a wonderful woman. xoxo
Julie Leto Another friend I don’t get to spend a lot of time with…but a friendship I hold dear. Julie, you know I think you’re awesome! I love your honor and loyalty it’s what bonds us as friends. ;-)

Now, as usual I’m not done because eight is not enough! So, I’m giving out three more HONORARY AWARDS as well.
Vicki Lane Girl! I can’t forget you! It was the birds of a feather that brought us together and bonded us as friends. You’re a sweetie and everyone knows it! Hugs.
Rocki You’ve been a dear friend since the start of my adventure in the writing world. I’ve always adored you – you know that!
AND LAST BUT NOT LEAST –
Dottie What goes around comes around my friend! You’re such a sweetheart!

O.K., everyone, Dottie’s to blame for this weeks blog! ;-)
WHAT IS FRIENDSHIP?

What constitutes as a friend in your mind?

Is it someone who calls you everyday to see if you’re alright? Or is it that one person you go to whenever you need a true friend to tell you like it is, but you don’t spend a lot of time with?

Can a stranger in a crowd, who steps up to protect you from a bad person, be a friend? A stranger who bonds with you in just that moment of time, but you never see again, yet you can’t forget the kind act of true friendship he showed?

What makes a friend? Is it loyalty? Honor? Caring and sharing? Or just someone who listens to your problems? Is it something in common that binds you?
What if you know someone who doesn’t share private information about themselves – are they a friend? Do you have to spill the beans about your life to be a friend?
What forms the bonds of friendship?
How do you know when it’s real or just a friendship of convenience?

It’s hard to know when you’re being a good friend or a bad friend…everyone’s expectations of a friend seems to be so different. But is it really?

I have very few rules for making friends BUT the few I have are not easy ones. To me a friend is a friend forever as long as HONOR is always the top priority. Honor (your word) means everything to me. I can live with any faults you have as my friend, as long as I know your word is good.

I can talk with my friends every day or not talk for years and when we do talk, it’s as if we spoke yesterday. My feelings don’t change because of distance or how often we speak. A true heart is a true heart…time plays no roll in relationships, nor does space.

To me a friend is the one person I don’t have to make excuses to about things. I’ve heard girls talk about their “Best Friend” and in the same breath say, “Well, I’ll have to tell a little white lie to Mary…she’s my best friend but she’ll be so hurt if I don’t come, but I’m just not up to it tonight.” To me this is sad, and Mary isn’t much of a friend if she makes you feel like you have to lie!
If Mary was a good friend, a true friend she will be disappointed that you, her best friend, wasn’t able to come to her party, BUT as a friend she should understand and know…as her best friend, you’d do everything in your power to go. You’re BEST FRIENDS for Pete’s sake, but if you’re not up to it, you’re not up to it. A true friend would understand this.

In my friendships, I don’t want my friends to feel like they have to lie to me about anything. I don’t want my friends thinking I would judge them either. I’m a firm believer in “Until I walk in your shoes” I can’t judge you. AND if I did walk in your shoes…I’d do exactly what you did…because I’m in your shoes - walking in your life - so my beliefs and experiences would be your beliefs and experiences - so I couldn’t do anything BUT walk the path you chose. SO – HOW COULD I STAND IN JUDGEMENT?
I expect the same respect from my friends towards me. Leave the judging of others to the Gods…that’s their job, not man’s.

I want my friends to know…my friendship offers no pressure. I accept you as you are. I’ll adore all the good in you and accept the bad in you as well. We’re human’s…we’re not perfect. I might not like or even agree with the bad I see, but I won’t judge you for it. You have your reasons…be they right or wrong, and I have to respect that.

If you ask me to help you change - I’ll do my best to help you overcome the negative – if this change is YOUR DESIRE….that’s what friends do…BUT only when asked.
I believe a person will change when THEY are ready and not before. And I know when they are ready for a change in their lives – The Gods will send them the teacher. If the Gods choose me to be that teacher, then and only then will I teach.

A friend is someone who allows me the freedom to be myself. A friend you never have to FAKE anything with. They don’t talk behind your back or stab you in the back. As a friend, if I promise to keep your secret…I will HONOR my words forever…the secret was told during the friendship and even if that friendship has ended, I will honor the promises made during that relationship. And I expect that from my friends old and new, in friendship or ex-friendships. HONOR.

But that’s just me.

So, how about you? What do you expect from a friend and the friendship?

Hawk

38 comments:

~Sia McKye~ said...

Morning Hawk. Well aren't you a sweetheart. :-)

Friendship is very important to me as well. I have a girlfriend of many years that says of friendship, boyfriends can and go, but your girlfriends are always there. I admit, the older I get the more important girlfriends are.

I'm with you on loyalty and honor and I add integrity (loyalty and honor in action) to those important qualities. Honor is such an old fashion concept today, isn't it? Qualities that one must have before one can extend them to others.

I have a large circle of acquaintances, business and personal, I enjoy spending time with. It’s like wearing a three-strand necklace. My dad used to say; our true friends are those we can count on one hand if we’re lucky. These are the ones that know the good bad and the ugly about us (and vise versa) and yet still love us, and in times of trouble, stand by us and in times of joy, celebrate with us. They are those ones we can kick off our shoes and just be who we are. These are our intimate friends. Kindred spirits. I have a couple of cyber friends in that group, those with whom I talk to on the phone, we meet up when they are in my area or I’m in theirs. You might say these “jewels” are worn closest to my throat. The second strand is special and I enjoy spending time with them. I have some cyber friends that I’ve built up some strong bonds with regardless of distance over the years. They enhance my life. I can’t imagine being without them. The third strand is made up of business connections, casual friendships built up of common goals and thought. They make life enjoyable. My necklace compliments everything I wear and I’m never without it.

Have a great week!

Lea said...

Hawk:

Now you've gone and made me weepy. What can I say but the feelings are equally mutual. Anything I can do for you anytime....

Thank you for the special blog award, Dottie is a sweetie isn't she?

You are very special.

(((Cyber Hugs)))

L

Houston A.W. Knight said...

Sia,

I love the friend comparison to a three-stranded pearl necklace!

True friends are pearls! and I have to agree with the three strands in how friends land in your life.

Honor is rare today...that's why I say my rules are few but hard. Honor above all else is what puts an acquaintances into my friend of a life time place. When I see they have honor...I know loyalty and integrity follow. You can't have honor without either of those.

BTW, Sia, has anyone ever told you you're a pretty pearl on a short strand? xoxo because you are in my book!

Hugs
Hawk

Houston A.W. Knight said...

Lea!

Hon, you know how I feel about you! You're the sweetest, nicest and most adorable person I know! No one deserves this award more than you.

Oh, Dottie...what a doll - I adore her too!
And I'm so thankful she gave this award to me. It allowed me the opportunity to tell all you girls how I feel about you...each and everyone of you are on my necklace of pearls.

Cyber hugs back ((((big squeeze)))))
Hawk

My Blog 2.0 (Dottie) said...

Hi Hawk!

*weeping* blame me for the blog *sniffing* I hate it when I'm snotty and blotchy! lol Know, dear Hawk, you are one of a kind, special, a sweetness that permeates everything you do, you bring joy and happiness to those around.

Hawk, you know how to hit the nail on the head. I've been in this dilemma. One of my friends has quit speaking to me abruptly, and I heard from others (we live in a very small community, only 3000 people), that she did it because she had just too many friends! (WHO can have too many FRIENDS?) I'm still friendly, saying Hi when I see her, but I don't count her as a friend anymore, she has broken the trust that I gave her when I called her friend. People grow and change, and grow apart. It's usually good to grow, but now I don't think I ever really knew her.

I'm naive, I know, but it's how I was brought up, you stand behind your friends through thick and thin, through right and wrong. I don't have to agree with your opinions, but I do have to understand them, believe in your belief in them. It is a conviction that I cannot change.

So, honor, loyality, integrity, all characteristics that I try to possess, and I look for in others. These are hard commodities to find.

I have raised my children in the same way that I have been taught. It has cost them some of their innocence that I, at times, wish I could give back. They are not always part of the crowd. They have been hurt by others because of their beliefs of right and wrong. Belief in oneself and in those that you hold close to you are values I do not wish to give up.

I like Sia's idea that friendship is a necklace. I've always looked at friends as precious jewels, hard to find and something to value.

BTW, I love the new blog look, Lea is a very special person to give so willingly of her time and effort! She is truly a sweet friend!

((((hugs and more))))

Dottie ^~^

Vicki said...

Love the new look on the blog and OMG, thank you for the award. You are such a dear friend and one who I'm thankful for each day.

I once heard that true friendship picks up the sand and shakes it through their fingers, allowing all the junk to fall by wayside. What's left is an open hand ready to take hold of the other and thus friendship is a clasping of each others hearts, knowing no one is perfect, but allowing the junk to fall away.

Houston A.W. Knight said...

Dottie!

Yes, Lea is a sweetheart! I adore her and I love what she did to my blog and yours! She's an awesome lady!

It's so sad when people you thought were friends turn out to be something else...but the way I see it is...they've missed out not me.

Yes, I fully understand what your children have been through...my nephews have been raised by my twin sister to believe as we do and they have found "Fitting In" hard at times. And they have been hurt as well. I feel for them, but there is a bigger picture they are working towards - that picture being their spiritual growth. That's the important picture and they know (her two sons) that they always have each other. Blood is stronger than anything else and it will hold you while you're here on this side of the worlds.

HONOR; rare but so fulfilling to the soul and worth any price you pay.

Some friends are like ships in the night...they come and go but your honor is always there. NO ONE - CAN TAKE THAT FROM YOU.

So stand strong and don't waste another minute worrying about this so called friend...obviously -SHE wasn't one to begin with.

Besides - you got me and LEA...what do you need her for? LOL ;-)

Hugs babe!
Hawk

Houston A.W. Knight said...

VICKI!!!!

Oh, I love the sand story -it's so true! That's how people should hold their friendships - never let the flaws interfere with the whole and what you gain from the friendship. True friends overlook our blunders and grumpiness.

The new look is in thanks to LEA! She did it for me and I just think it's awesome!

The award...it's just a small way to say thank you for your wonderful friendship. I cherish it and will always honor what we've shared and share still.
I adore you, but you know that! ;-)

Hugs & kisses
Hawk

My Blog 2.0 (Dottie) said...

Hi Hawk!

You truly are a sweetie!

Oh, thank you for the award and for stopping by and lifting my spirits.

As you said, it's her loss.

I try not to let things like that bother, but sometimes I think I feel too deeply, I wouldn't be who I am if I didn't. I tend to be passionate about my friends and causes, and sometimes that leads to trouble or tears. Maybe I'll outgrow it as I get older - it would have to be extremely old age.
Can you see me as a granny, fighting for what I believe in? lolol I just cracked myself up!

Dottie :)

Houston A.W. Knight said...

Dottie!

You said, "I try not to let things like that bother, but sometimes I think I feel too deeply, I wouldn't be who I am if I didn't."

Hon, it's better to feel deeply and feel the pain than never to feel at all.
You said it...IF YOU DIDN'T FEEL DEEPLY - IT WOULDN'T BE YOU.
Best you can do is to realize when this happens -it's her loss, not yours. You know she just lost a good friend...smile and move on. She will discover this soon enough and I feel sorry for her. Friends are not easy to find...she missed out.
It is you who knows how to be a friend...she does not...and that's sad.

You said, "I tend to be passionate about my friends and causes, and sometimes that leads to trouble or tears."

True, it will but without your passion, without the fight, what good is life? Lift is for FEELING it all.
That's why I love being Irish - we are a people of passion! Good or bad - WE FEEL PASSIONATE ABOUT IT ALL! It's what makes us feel alive and enjoy life even with it's tears...without tears we wouldn't know happiness, now would we?

You said,"Maybe I'll outgrow it as I get older"

HONEY - I HOPE NOT! This is you and this is what makes you so loveable.

You said, "Can you see me as a granny, fighting for what I believe in? lolol I just cracked myself up!"

Now ya' listen ta' me lassy - I don't care what age ya' are...ya' will always be fight'in for ya'er beliefs and if ya' ever think ta' stop - I'll be there in a minute to make ya' get up and fight...NEVER EVER GIVE UP ON YOUR BELIEFS - to the death they will go with us! PROUDLY!

Now you be smil'in and danc'in - you know you know how to be a friend and you're cherished by many! BTW, we love the fight in ya'!

;-D Ya' must have a wee bit of Irish in ya', now don't ya'?

Cyber hugs
Hawk

My Blog 2.0 (Dottie) said...

Hi again Hawk!

I might be havin' a wee bit, now, don't ya' know, but odd I would be a sayin' cos it be Scot-Irish in me.

lolol!!

And ne'er two be mixin' cept for me da!

Dottie :)

Houston A.W. Knight said...

LOL, Dottie!

Nothing wrong with a Scot who has a wee bit of Irish in him....BUT now you know why you FEEL so strong about things.

Something about those lands and the blood from there.It's in your blood (as it is in mine) to stand up for what you believe. It's in your blood to fight for honor...it's just the way we are.

And you know what? I like that about us! Yes, it causes us pain because we get disappointed in some, BUT think of all the friends that are true and like the old saying goes...for the normal person...if they can say they've had ONE good friend in their life they are lucky...NOW, how many do you have because of who YOU ARE?
So, now, aren't ya' luckier than most?

Stay positive and know there will be a few in the path just to remind you to be happy for those close friends you do have that are honest and true.

xoxo hugs Darlin'
Hawk

Liza said...

Hawk,

You are such a sweetie! Friendships mean everything to me. I have my friends that I've known for many years that I know we are there for one another at the drop of a hat(I sent out a mass text for prayer for my bil last night and had responses within seconds). I also have my new friends that I mostly only know from the internet, but are just as important to me. I think all friends are a blessing from God and I treasure each of mine.

Thank you for your friendship!

You had asked about my blog link. When I set up the links on my blog, I just used copy and paste to put in the links. Not sure if that will help.

Houston A.W. Knight said...

Liza!

I so enjoy our friendship and I hope your Bil is doing alright...I'll add him to my thoughts and prayers as well! Hugs.

Yeah, your link only works for me if I use your pink picture. I've cut and paste the link and it still will not go to your site. I know I have the addie right - I've checked it several times...not sure why it doesn't go. Odd, hum, computers! }:-/

know I'm thinking of you and yours! xoxo

Hawk

Judi Fennell said...

Hi Hawk! Sorry it took me so long to get here! Pesky things, deadlines!

What's a friend? Someone you can call up when someone hurts your feelings and who will immediately say that the hurter is an idiot. Someone who knows my faults and hangs around anyway (hmmm, kinda sounds like a marriage LOL. But I did marry my friend.)

A friend is someone you could handle being stranded on a deserted island with - and not want to push them into the volcano at the center of it.

Thank you so much for another blog award. And you call me sweet - ha! I think you take the cake on that one, sweetie!

Houston A.W. Knight said...

LOL Judi!

Push them into a volcano! {:-O
Oh my...please say I'm your friend! LOL What a way to die...can't I just move to the other side of the island if you don't like me? Do you have to push me in the volcano?

See, it's because you say things like that, that make me adore you! Yes, I will love you through all the good and bad sides of you. Even through all those pesky deadlines! Teeheeheee. Yes, it's like a marriage, and YES - do marry your BEST Friend - I did and I love him to death...he's my true Hero.

Here's to friends...even ones who will push you into a volcano when they're grumpy. ;-)

LOL
Hugs
Hawk

Judi Fennell said...

No worries. No volcano for you (cue the Soup Nazi from Seinfeld)...

:)

Houston A.W. Knight said...

Judi!

LOL. I loved that show! And the soup Nazi - oh, my sides still hurt from laughing at that one!

I visited your blog the other day - awesome how you got all the covers to your books on it! LOVE IT!!

Hugs
Hawk

Judi Fennell said...

I'm lucky the covers are so gorgeous! The art dept did an amazing job!

Now to find some cover art contests... well, after I get #3 in.

Talk to you!

Houston A.W. Knight said...

Judi,

Did you get to have some say on your covers? Like the colors, models, fonts and such? Just wondering, but they are awesome either way.

Hugs
Hawk

My Blog 2.0 (Dottie) said...

Hi Hawk!

I left a couple of awards for you on my blog.

Dottie :)

Houston A.W. Knight said...

Dottie!

I just love the awards - thank you so much.

Ah, the Tinker Bell award is my favorite! xoxox

Thank you!
Hawk

Judi Fennell said...

Hmmm, I responded but blogger must have eaten my comment. Guess it was just so sweet... LOL.

The only input I had was they asked me about the stories and physical descriptions of the characters and locations. So, Atlantis on the 2nd book is appropriate (actually, it would be for all 3), and the beach scene on #3 is too (again, would be for all of them). I had no say in the pictures of the heroes, those are stock photos anyway, no live shoots. But they did get them right b/c Reel and Rod are mermen, naturally they'll have swimmers' builds, which those guys do. Logan (#3) is a Human, so he can be bulkier, which he is on the cover.

I'm just thrilled that the covers are so gorgeous.

Houston A.W. Knight said...

OMG, they came that close to matching the hero's without your picking them!!! WOW, that's one heck of an art department...I can only pray when I get my books sold, whoever I get, will be as good on my covers as they were on yours.

You lucky girl you...when I go to Vegas will you go with me?

xoxo
Hawk

Donna MacMeans said...

Hi Hawk -

Thanks so much for recognizing the bandits in your award of friendship, it is indeed an honor.

Isn't it amazing how the internet has changed some of the very basics tenets of friendship? When I was growing up, one could only choose friends by physical proximity. You made friends of your schoolmates, your neighbors, your relatives, etc.

Now you can make close friends of someone thousands of miles away, and never have met them. The banditas all met in cyberspace as the result of the 2006 Golden Heart awards - now I can't imagine any closer friends. We've all met face-to-face at this point, but the friendship was established first.

Excellant post, Hawk. Thanks for including us.

Houston A.W. Knight said...

Donna,

I agree with you - cyber space has allowed everyone to find friends they never would have...I know I'm grateful for the friendships I've made here and treasure each and everyone of you.

I'm looking forward to seeing you face to face at the Nationals!

Hugs
Hawk

Kirsten said...

Another Bandita here to thank you for your friendship, Hawk! We are so blessed to have such great friends all over the world. Cyber space is nothing compared to the love of friends like you!

Anna Campbell said...

Hawk, thanks so much for including the Banditas in your stellar list! Wow, that's seriously flattering!

Houston A.W. Knight said...

Oh Kirsten, you're such a sweetheart and always say such nice things...that's one of the reasons I adore you so!
Here's to a long cyber friendship!

Super cyber hugs
Hawk - thanks for stopping by! xox I hope to see you at the Nationals!

Houston A.W. Knight said...

Anna!

Hey sweetie - I've missed you! How are things going over there?

Thanks for coming by to get the award...I just want you girls to know how special you all are to me.

Hugs
Hawk

Jeanne (AKA The Duchesse) said...

Hi Hawk! Thanks for saying such lovely things about us Romance Bandits! We love you too. Grins.

BTW, great post on the Romans too. Joanie T will like that.

I enjoy your blog, even when I don't have time to comment. We lurkers DO read and enjoy!

:>

Cassondra said...

Hey Hawk!

Thanks so much for including us in this award!

I'm amazed at how relationships can develop across such huge distances now--all because of the internet. I'm blessed with friends I would have, otherwise, never known. There's still nothing like a face-to-face coffee and something sweet with a best friend of course, and I find myself making excuses to try to get more of that--and to get together with my cyber-friends when I get the chance. Conferences, workshops, retreats...a lot of the friendships--even the "physically close" ones I have now would not have happened without a meeting and getting acquainted via the internet.

We love having you visit us, and I like lurking on other blogs, though if I commented on all, I'd never write. *sigh* can't forget the goal. *sigh* but I'd rather play. (grin)

LOVE the blog about the Romans, btw. Can't wait until Joanie reads that.

Trish Milburn (Tricia Mills) said...

Hawk, thanks so much for the award to the Romance Bandits. I took cherish every one of them. I'm very fortunate to be a part of that fun, supportive group.

Houston A.W. Knight said...

Jeanne,

Glad to hear you're lurking! That's awesome. I'm flattered to know that, Duchesse!
(BTW, the title - is it through marriage or a writer's nick-name?)

I'm telling you - you girls make it easy to say the things I say because you're all so sweet!

Come lurking any old time. I'm glad you enjoy the articles.

Hugs (and I can hug you Duchesse because I'm titled a Princess by Irish family bloodlines. Yap, we've got a family castle and all) ;-) so I can hug you! :-D

Big Hugs
Hawk

Houston A.W. Knight said...

Cassondra,

I agree with you, the internet has made possible so many wonderful things.
Cyber friends being one of them...and I've found a treasure when I found the Romance Bandits...you girls, each and every one of you, are so special in your own ways! I adore you all!
I'm looking forward to meeting each of you at the nationals this year, so we can see each other face to face and make our cyber friendship a physical one as well.
Tell Joanie to hurry on over...Roman will be gone come Sunday! ;-)

Hugs
Hawk

Houston A.W. Knight said...

TRISH,

My green eyes are filled with envy...I'd give anything to be apart of the Romance Bandits...you're all so creative and such wonderful women to be around even in the cyber world! It's a very rare thing you've got! BUT, I'm so glad you're all so willing to let us "wanna be's" be apart of it every now and then. I feel blessed.

Hey, if you're into awards then come on back in the next few weeks because I'll be passing out more and someone will be on it (Hint) ;-)

Hugs
Hawk

jo robertson said...

Hi, Hawk,

Yet another Bandita popping over to say thanks for the mention and the support you give Romance Bandits. We Banditas were very lucky to come together as 20 strangers, all of whom finalled in the 2006 Golden Heart, and really like one another. Amazing girls, they are!

I certainly agree with Donna's comment on friendships. When I was a girl, our friends by necessity had to be those who lived in the neighborhood and/or were in your school or church classes. Oh, sure, we had "pen pals," but we often never really knew those people, separated by oceans as it were.

Great blog!

Houston A.W. Knight said...

Jo!

I have to agree with you...you girls were very lucky to have found each other and actually found a friendship as well...that is what is so awesome about the Romance Bandits...it's not just business...it's a deep respect and friendship as well.

THIS is so rare...hold on to it forever...you are special women...and you've come together and bonded as women should.

If only more women were like you girls ...this world would be a better place for sure.

It's going to take the women of the world to see, it is US, who will make the changes this world needs...when God said "It is the Meek who shall inherit the Earth..." who do you think he was talking about?
I believe it was us...the WOMEN...and only we can make the Earth right again...
It's why the Earth is called the "Mother Earth" isn't it?

Thank for coming by Jo! You're always welcome as are your RB sisters! I adore you all!

Cyber hugs
Hawk